Breakfast Club '05: Ban the studded belt

So I went to see a band in which a friend of mine’s son plays, Forgetting Montgomery, a three piece, one of those post-punk emo type units. The name comes from a girl they all new, which is so wimpy, and thus, emo.

I told them it would be a better name for a neo-soul group, as in let’s forget about Alabama. Their old name was Self Control, which seems like it would be about jerking off, which is a much better topic for a navel-gazing emo band.

First things first: Kids, stop shopping at Hot Topic. It is not cool. It is in a mall, and malls were never cool. And stop wearing those wide studded belts that come in white or silver.

Irony or not, it is so Bowie-meets-the Sex Pistols. At Hot Topic. Plus, its androgynous, and since all of you are dressing like its 1977, with an apparent aversion to soap, it’s hard enough as it is to tell the boys from the girls.

And stay off my lawn!

As for the band, I must say I enjoyed it. I can’t recall that last time I saw a group where the guitarist was the quiet one and the bass player did all the talking. Never mind. The Police just came to mind, and man who wants to do any thinking about Sting?

The drummer, he did the screaming. No harmonies, just an occasional screech, like he was really mad at his parents.

The animated bassist/lead singer is a cherub who reminded me of Ross the Intern on Jay Leno’s show, but for the fact the singer apparently is straight as all his songs are about girls and girls not liking him anymore.

But they are all only going to be juniors at a Catholic high school next year, so it’s not a bad start. The last big thing out of the same school is Alkaline Trio, which has members who dabble in Anton Lavey’s brand of the occult. Go figure.

The crowd was upper middle class white suburban kids, so it was all very Breakfast Club ‘05, which is fine by me.

How dangerous can rock be if mom and dad are in the crowd, anyway?

The band after them was some college rock outfit from Buffalo called Bensin that is touring the country in a bus that looks like something left over from the shootout in Waco. They all had those stupid white studded belts on, too.

They barely made the show, the aforementioned Partridge mobile having broke down on the way from a gig in Denver.

They had a synthesizer, but made poor use of it, adding cheese doodle riffs, like something from a Styx album, with Fred Durst-like power chord guitar work. They were very proud of the fact two of their songs have been picked up by a video game.

Once they get a ring tone deal, they’ll be on their way.